A few weeks ago, I went to the cemetery by myself. I sat down next to the settled dirt where Abby rests and started talking to her out loud. I felt silly doing this, but I figured what the heck!! I told her that I loved the pink blossoms, on what we call, "Freddie's Tree" in front of her. They were pinkalicious and each time Emilia would join me she would pick the flowers and give them to Abby. I spoke to Abby, wondering where she was and what was she doing. I told her I picture her running and dancing with Jesus. I wasn't finished with those words out of my mouth, when a beautiful yellow butterfly fluttered past me! I believe that was Abby's way of saying hello!
Recently, I travelled back to Cape Breton, the place where I grew up to attend my grandfather's funeral. My favorite childhood memories of my grandparents were summer trips to their cabin, known as 'The Bees Nest'. Their three room getaway overlooked a beautiful river and you can only imagine the gorgeous music it made!! The day following his funeral we visited his place of solitude to release his ashes into the river. I arrived at the cabin with my sisters a few minutes following the rest of my family. I entered the cabin to say hello and then walked outside to reminisce my childhood. I found myself overlooking the river, watching the current and soaking in the sounds of nature. I envisioned twenty years prior, my Gramps fishing down below, my cousins and I swimming in the river and rope climbing the steep banks. Then, something caught my attention and my brain was trying to register what I was seeing. Below me, on the side of the steep bank, was something very peculiar and not what you would expect to see. Stuffed in a bunch of vines and thorn bushes was a perfectly, still blown, intact, purple balloon!! I couldn't believe my bulging eyes and I'm still feeling the effects of my discovery! If you read an earlier post, The Purple Balloon, you would understand my reaction to seeing a purple balloon on the side of my Gramp's riverbank!!
This is no coincidence. This is Abby's little miracle.
What does this message mean? For me, Abby is letting her mommy know that she and my Gramps have united and that they are with me!!
What does this message mean? For me, Abby is letting her mommy know that she and my Gramps have united and that they are with me!!
I hear Abby from time to time. Last week we attended a memorial service for all children who passed away at Childrens Hospital this past year. We were able to honor Abby by saying her name and placing flowers in a basket on her behalf. During the ceremony, I felt Abby's presence. She was definitely with us, and she let us know through music!! She's definitely my daughter, because she knows I love music! Three very important songs just so happened to be played by various staff members of Childrens Hospital throughout the night.
1) You'll be in My Heart 2) You raise me up 3) In the arms of an angel
Why these songs??
Well, in the car on the way into Boston, my kids watched Tarzan. "You'll be in My Heart" was sung by the Boston Childrens Choir which happens to be the theme song for Tarzan!! What are the odds that we pick Tarzan to watch just before attending Abby's memorial service?
"You raise me up" is a no brainer! If you went to my wedding, you would know why. I chose this song to dance the traditional "father/daughter" dance at my wedding with my dad. "You raise me up", popularized by Josh Groban was also my very last dance I had with my dad. He died three weeks following my wedding due to a swift battle with cancer. My nieces Melissa and Astrid came with us to Abby's service at Childrens Hospital. Melissa felt Abby too. She said whenever she heard this song, that she would picture and see me and my dad dancing. But not that night. Instead, she pictured Abby and my Dad dancing, smiling and happy!!
"In the arms of an angel". These words are very significant for Roberto and I. When I resigned from my job, a going away party was held for me. One of the gifts that I received was a stone ornament, an angel holding a baby. This ornament was placed on my nightstand, but Roberto moved it to our Abby shrine in our kitchen following the day she met Jesus because we believe that this was a message from God and that she truly is in the arms of an angel now. Not to mention, the day of Abby's wake, our niece, Melissa was inspired to write these words "In the arms of an angel" on our white board on our refrigerator. These words are still there and I have no intention of removing them. Lastly, if you remember in my post "The Purple Balloon", I mentioned that these exact words going to be engraved on Abby's grave marker. I can't wait for it to be installed.
Am I fishing for these little coincidences? Not a chance!! I don't have the creativity to make all of this up!
It is in these little gifts that give me hope to help me live life. Treasures that I hold onto to keep going.
With the grace from God, I see, feel, and hear Abby.
Abby is without a doubt, dancing with Jesus and my Dad, playing and fishing with my Gramps, and
In the Arms of an Angel.
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