Monday, January 7, 2013
I can't believe it is already 2013. Even though I am so very glad that 2012 is behind us, it feels bittersweet since I am that much further away from Abby in time. Abby was the best blessing for us in 2012.
We embraced Christmas as best as anyone can in our situation.
I owe many thanks to our family and friends who not only included Abby in your Christmas but thought of us, sent cards with her name on it, sent us Abby ornaments for our tree, had Abby ornaments for your own tree, visited her tiny grave on Christmas Day since we were in Cape Breton, sang her Silent Night, Abby's poem that my mom wrote, and for all of your emails of love and support. Your thoughtful words of comfort and love is very much welcomed for a grieving mother and father.
These tiny gestures above have created Abby memories for our family. With our Abby, we have a blank slate if you will since we grieve a future lost. Very little memories have been created with her, since we only had her for three short weeks. I cherish my memories of her, those moments while holding her, singing to her, rocking her...all of the things that I should still be doing. But those memories of "firsts" and "seconds" etc. are and will be very different for Roberto and I because we physically don't have her here with us to celebrate her life and her milestones. We need to parent Abby differently and with that, we have created memories of her through all of you and your amazing tributes. From the bottom of my heart, thank you.
Also, we will be holding a special party for Abby's first birthday next month. I can't believe that Abby would be turning one. We have lost so much.
As you know, we travelled to Cape Breton for Christmas. Christmas at my moms is just what I needed. It was a beautiful experience and I am so grateful to have been able to be with my family. The kids also had an exciting time. They loved spending time with Grammie and their international cousins! LOL.
I'm not sure what 2013 will bring for our family. Hopefully peaceful moments and moments of light.....